Still struggling after 6 months and even losing my lust

After my last relationship, where I already had erection issues, ended, I decided not too engage in a new relationship for a while. I went on a trip and starting meditating more here in the app and thought I was slowly but surely improving.

Now 1 month ago, I met this incredibly girl and on our first date, we hit it off like crazy.
Come second date, two days ago, we end up at her house, start kissing, I get hard, but by the time we’re in the bedroom naked my erection is gone again.

I felt really bad, my confidence dropped to an all time low. I really like this girl, worked on my situation for the last 6 months and no change.

I’m 39, I never had any issues until up to about 2 years ago when it sporadically happened. I’m pretty sure it’s psychological but I will get a full physical just to make sure.

Thing is, because it has happened multiple times, I do not feel aroused that often anymore, I don’t even masturbate anymore. How can I fix that? Even two nights ago with that girl, I was having a great time and really enjoyed kissing her but didn’t feel the same arousal as in the past, my guess is because of the nerves and the fear of not getting an erection.

What to do?

I have had similar struggles dude. To me, it is all mental and is a hard cycle to break once you fail. You have failed before so when you are in a situation where you want to perform, your mind worried about failing instead. It triggers fight or flight response which kills the erection. It’s a viscous cycle. For me, until I am really comfortable with a person I will struggle greatly. The issue is finding a partner that is patient and understanding.

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