Pretty much just the whole time I am spectatoring.
Really anytime I know sex is on the table. I just have no confidence I’ll stay hard. Condoms are also a huge trigger. My mind just knows that will kill any erection.
Anytime I think back to whenever sex “didn’t work”. I haven’t used condoms very often, but each time I have, it’s been an erection destroyer. That gets me very worried when I am about to have sex.
- first time having sex with someone
- the excitement she has and the anticipation of performing for her
- wearing a condom
I’m on anxiety meds that make my penis less sensitive, with it being less sensitive I feel like I’m losing interest during sex after I’ve pleased my partner. Then the pressure for me to climax is there and that’s where I lose my erection.
It’s random adding lube to my penis or changing positions even when my wife reacts in a way I think means she is not enjoying what I’m doing…
Outside distractions, cell phone ringing, text messages going off, fear of someone is going to interrupt the moment.
Going to put the condom on and spread lube. While I’m fucking my dick goes soft due to thinking about my partners pleasure, proving to myself and them that I am good at sex, asking myself why they aren’t moaning more. Also if I’m not close to cumming and I have been at it for a bit, I start to worry they are uncomfortable and that I should stop. The last think I have thought about is my own pleasure and being present
Maybe putting in a butt plug and just maybe putting on a condom just anything that basically takes me away from the situation and puts me in my head
Generally once the spotlights is on me I start to get nervous. When I’m pleasuring my partner everything works fine, probably because I’m not thinking about myself. Once the encounter changes to myself being pleasured or even intercourse, I can quickly lose my erection
I tend to lose my erection when the girl is on top, so I worry in advance that she will want to have sex in that position. That thought process alone can cause me to lose my erection and if she goes on top, because I have been worrying about it, I lose it almost immediately
Definitely relate to putting the condom on since that is when I know it is show time and I know I am supposed to perform.
Definitely putting a condom on puts the pressure on me because I know now it is show time.
The condom definitely gives me anxiety and kills my erections. Also, my partner is a sexy, and wild female. Her father was strict and she told me this made her develop a desire to be dominated. I am a more sensual, less dominating type of lover for now and I don’t feel I have the strength or power to dominate a woman, especially a woman who is harder to please or shows less response to what I’m doing to please her. So my confidence goes down and my erection follows. I get panic and performance anxiety pervades me.
Putting on a condom, kills the flow and puts me into my head and away from the moment.
I get anxious when putting on a condomn, as well as sometimes before or during because I spectatorate
Sometimes oral sex. I am worried my penis will get desensitised and I will not stay hard or cum during sex
Whenever I’ve had to put a condom on I loose it as I become less excited as I know there is a barrier between me and my partner
Going down on my girl is typically when the performance anxiety comes in. I start to think “shoot I better be ready to go after this”… because I don’t want to disappoint her or have her feel bad or anything after going down on her. But deep breathing and being aware of spectatoring has honestly helped a lot! Box breathing in the 69 has been my go-to and has helped quite a bit
Any pause before penetration will start spectorating because it puts the focus right back on my erection. I often feel if I can just get it in as quickly as possible that I have the best chance to not lose my erection.