Sexual anxiety with Staying firm when it’s time to penetrate

I’m having sexual anxiety I get and maintain a hard erection during oral but when it’s time to penetrate I become soft and can regain my stiffness not sure what is going on I tried pills and still same thing happens

I have the same issues. I take Viagara and wait the allotted time needed. He gets rock hard, then just before penetration he loses it. Getting very frustrated. I get hard again when she is giving me oral. Sometimes she jumps on sometimes she doesn’t.
My Ed is performance related for the most part. Any thoughts and ideas would be greatly appreciated.

Sorry to hear that you’re struggling with this - I can relate.

What do you reckon that you’re worried about in relation to the act of penetration? What thoughts or feelings influence the move away from being rock hard?

For me, I really struggle to get out of my head. Sometimes I will get hard during the warm-up, but other times I won’t be able to avoid worrying about the presumed lack of response from my dick.

When I do have an erection, I have historically worried that she won’t be ready to take me (even after a lot of foreplay) and that it’s my role as a man to give her a great time. I also feel self-conscious that I look unattractive or silly (which makes no sense because I never judge how a partner looks negatively, so why would she do this to me?). And I worry about getting sweaty and feeling uncomfortable, and thus not wanting to have sex anymore.

My inner voice thinks that it’s helping me to avoid humiliation and disappointment somehow (based on the avoidance of repeating the trauma of the past), whereas actually it ends up causing new trauma and preventing me to having the “success” that would give me the confidence to put my issues behind me.