Hey guys, any tips or recommendations on how to handle a less than supportive partner?
PE is why I’m here (sometimes ED but infrequently) and my wife gets frustrated/ disappointed when it happens. Last weekend we were starting sex for the first time since I started Mojo and I felt fight or flight coming on so I stopped and did some breathing to re ground myself for no more than a minute or two. The good news is it worked I was able to continue without issue… the bad news is she was frustrated I stopped and it totally killed the mood for her. I continued for awhile, which was a win to me, but finished up because she wasn’t enjoying it.
We discussed and she was honest with me, but that also put more pressure on me to perform which is the opposite of what I’m working towards. What it comes down to is she needs PIV sex to enjoy it and has little to no interest in toys, oral, or manual stimulation. We’ve got a lot going on (young kids, both work, kids activities) but I think it’s important to improve our sex life (which was never very often, 1-2x /month) to where we can both enjoy it.
Any tips, tricks, or recommendations to improve or better manage the pressure? Thanks!
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I was dating girl who, said she wasn’t satisfied with the penetrative Sex we had.
However, she insisted she would only come through penetrative sex, foreplay, licking and fingering is meaningless to her.
I asked if she is down to work on that attitude while I am working on my PE.
When she said no, I walked away.
I think, PE can be dealt with, given that there are other options to make women come and have pleasant evening. And there are even many women out there that prefer oral sex much over penetrative sex like another ex girlfriend of mine.
I decided to accept it, that I’d be happier with someone who enjoys oral sex more than penetrative sex. It makes us just much more compatible.
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So I think there are two options: totally change the experience of sex or walking away.
In my case, a day/ or evening on which I planned to get intimate with my ex girlfriend was rather a wholesome experience. Starting with a really good dinner or breakfast, showering together or going to a Spa, then coming home, slowly undressing, massages, touch, a lot massage oil, mcandle lights, using some wax, some dildo to play around with, giving each other head and so forth, mixed with more and more penetrative sex. We were usually doing that between one or three hours.
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We broke up because we did a 600k long distance relationship, where also regular sex wasn’t possible. But now as I am 10 weeks into Mojo, I am pretty sure I could over her much more than licking.
I have also experimented with doing sex a bit drunk, or with SSRI blockers, and desensitising sprays which all helped me
I don’t know a solution for you. It resonates though. My ex-wife felt this way that PIV was the only worthwhile way to have sex. I always felt the pressure of that. You’re not alone.
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Thanks for sharing! I like the idea of changing the experience of sex, we’ve definitely got into a rut over the years. I’ll have to think of how to approach it… I’ve been very clear that I will do/ try anything she wants in the bedroom, but I think I am more adventurous than she is.
I have the same issue, no toys and alternative options, i know that only if she say ( okey im fine with doing it only with toys will get my problem solved, but she doesnt understand it 
and the pressure never leaves , seems our relationship is over 3 y old its not easy to go away since most of the aspects of the relationship are working. I if theres any hack to change my mindset and not care about the result but i hadnt found it yet
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