I love eating out my gfs pussy and ass, she doesn’t like to give a bj because she thinks its derogatory for the woman and she says her jaws get locked. I do not get bjs when we are having sex so I don’t feel horny enough to climax without a bj, am i weong for wanting bjs? That is a major factor of my intimacy.
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Well you are not wrong to want a bj. I’m in same boat basically.
However you seem to expect her to want to give you one even though she doesn’t want to ( do you really want her to do stuff she doesn’t enjoy? ) I get it from a reciprocity point of view. Would you do stuff you find insulting for her if she asked?
At the end of the day how important is this to you deep down. You can’t make her want to want to .
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By the same token, by eating her pussy and ass you are making HER pleasure a priority and she seems to not mind that so much does she? Sounds a little selfish to me on her part. If it were me, I’d stop giving her oral. Any. See if she is as understanding with you. “My body, my right should go both ways.”
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This to me seems like she has heard this idea somewhere and now got it firmly lodged into her beliefs ,
Talk to her about it from the point of being purely curious, don’t point fingers etc , find out why she thinks it’s derogatory,
And maybe explain why you think it’s the opposite to that , it’s not derogatory at all,
To me in that moment , who ever is giving the BJ , is in complete control, we are usually at the mercy of whatever they do, if that is not empowering , I don’t know what is ….
However , as I say, I would just have a conversation and don’t aim to change her mind, find out the root cause of this belief and then talk about it in a way where she may come to the realisation all on her own , that the belief is not true …… try your best not to argue your point or force your belief , as she may then just pull back and ignore it more , allow her to come to the conclusions on her own (with some gentle guidance ) and she may realise
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Yes it’s quite interesting that where I live “suck on that” or “suck my dick” is said as a negative comment, insult or power comment. So you can possibly see where feelings of oral being derogatory come from. I’ve always been a bit sensitive to that myself - asking for a bj is not intended to be an insult from my perspective.