I have been struggling for about 5 years and the impact it is having on my relationship means myself and my wife who I have 3 kids with are at risk of separating.
The only time I can get hard, even though I may be alone and relaxed, is when I physically masturbate and the imagination does not do it alone. I think I have had a v bad relationship with masturbating for too long and am worried that because of that I am now reliant on it to get hard. Is that a thing?
If I stopped masturbating might that allow me to get hard via my imagination?
I’m beyond breaking point and really feel like there’s no fixing me….
My labido is not what it was and im not sure if that is because of the ED, too much masturbating or something else. Viagra isn’t helping either.
Any advice or input is appreciated
I am in a similar situation to yourself in that I am married with 3 kids.
About 3 years ago I lost an erection during sex and it destroyed my confidence.
I have so much anxiety around it that even when it goes well, I get even more anxious about the next time and letting my wife down.
I tried to cut out porn/ masterbation a number of times but failed and felt even more miserable. Ive watched the therapy sessions on porn here and found them quite good. All about moderation and not solely relying on it. They are worth a watch.
My advice would be to cut back on the masterbation but know in reality, you won’t give it up forever. Hopefully it will make a difference.
The Viagra works ok for me but I’ve probably introduced a crutch that will be difficult to get rid of. Some people try Cialis as an alternative and can work if Viagra didn’t.
Could you and your wife experiment with toys? Playing with a vibrator takes the pressure off to perform and she’ll be happy either way!
Lastly, Ive frequently thought like you over the last 3 years my relationship could collapse over this. My mental health has never been so low. Know you’re not alone in this…