Feeling sad and frustrated

I currently feel sad and frustrated, and I just want to share with you why.

I’m 27 years old and have been struggling with erectile dysfunction (ED) for as long as I’ve been sexually active. I’ve faced issues with erections, premature ejaculation, and sometimes, an inability to ejaculate. Despite having some good experiences, I haven’t been able to resolve these issues on my own and I didn’t seek help. My ED was my little secret.
I felt weak and less of a man, and my libido has diminished.
I haven’t been in a relationship, and that was okay with me. I told myself that I’m not the kind of man who’s meant for relationships. I believe that’s partly true, but I also didn’t dare to give myself a chance to have a normal relationship because I was scared of not being able to manage my problem.

For several months, I’ve been down, not just because of this problem, but also due to other unfortunate things happening in my life.

I decided to put an end to the mess and solve the problems that I could. I became more open about my sexuality and was able to talk about it with friends. I felt improvement and met a girl in a club. I liked her from the moment I saw her. We went home together that night, and as things became sexual, I had an issue with my erection again. However, I managed the situation, and it wasn’t awkward or anything. The next time we met and tried to have sex, the issue arose again. We tried to talk about it, but the situation was uncomfortable, and I was so frustrated that I couldn’t express myself properly and overshared about some things. She was kind and understanding, but after this meeting, the dynamics of our dating deteriorated, and she ended things today. She is a really great girl, and it’s unfortunate that this situation ruined my chance to have a girlfriend.



That is a sad experience and sorry you’re needing to deal with it. It’s really hard when potential relationships end like this.

I just wanted to say though really well done on what you’re doing. You have to be open and share where you are at with potential partners when the time feels right - unfortunately they may not choose to stay - but the ones that do? They are the ones that add to your life in the end.

Really try not to bottle yourself up again… the bottle breaks sooner or later.

Try not to be too harsh on yourself - sounds like you’ve got “stuff” going on - it takes time - and really the sex is the icing on the cake not the main event.

Take care of yourself & best wishes in the journey.


Hey man - if you were at a club, was alcohol involved? I’ve found that drinking really affects my ability to get an erection with someone new