Does ED apply to finishing?

I’m 22, and it feels super uncomfortable to eat a girl out, have sex, make her cum repeatedly in one session but I can’t finish.

At first I blamed it on being drunk or not finding them attractive enough but I’ve only had one partner I didn’t have an ED issue with and we had no foreplay in that relationship. I find myself getting hard immediately, but then when I go down on a partner my mind wanders to non sexual topics and by the time we move onto penetration I’m not hard anymore.

Most times I have sex, my mind wanders while fucking and I go soft. I don’t have issues getting hard again but staying hard and actually focusing on sex feels like an Achilles heel and I have no control on my thought processes.

I’ve had exes and partners tell me they feel defeated because I’ll make them cum several times in one session but they can’t make me cum once or it requires me jerking off, maybe with them stimulating elsewhere like my balls.