Breakup, now I’m scared for new partner

My girlfriend and I recently broke up, and not that I’m wanting to go out and have sex with everyone but i know im going to have another partner, and i would like to even have a few spontaneous hookups while im single too. The only sex I’ve ever had was with my first girlfriend years ago (no issues then) but then after a couple year gap of no sex I wasn’t able to get hard for months with my new (now ex) girlfriend. Even then, 50% of the time I still couldn’t get hard. I have high suspicions this will happen again, which eliminates any chance of hookups. If I have any worry about erection issues I won’t even put myself in a position to have a hookup, and when I get a new girlfriend I’m going to have to go through the same process again. Long story short I don’t want to “hoe around” but I would like a hookup every once in a while but I fear I can’t do that. The only reason I was able to usually get an erection with my ex is because it took me months of getting comfortable with her, and she was very understanding which idk if other women would be. It just also sucks because I would love to finish this mojo course but I have no way of telling if it worked or not until I put myself in a potential awkward and embarrassing situation


Should add that I do have autism with heightened anxiety

I have the same problems! Just started the course

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I’m not sure hook ups are a good idea for where you’re at, it’s a bit of a high pressure scenario, especially considering you have anxiety. I think that’s probably setting yourself up to fail.

You might need something with a bit more trust where you feel safe communicating, like a romantic relationship or a casual sexual relationship with a friend. Just my 2 cents! In the meantime I guess just try to build comfort with yourself :slight_smile:


I have to agree with this comment. It’s probably best if you avoid random hookups. It would likely suit you better to have a friends with benefits type of situation. Have that report, comfortability and trust with someone but not tied down to a relationship.

Best of luck out there!

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