My inner critic is male, but not me. He speaks in the form of warnings, but what they really are reminders of my previous issues when having sex.
It’s my voice telling me not to loose my erection, sometimes telling me I can’t get hard and if I do I won’t keep it
My inner critic is standing over me telling me i wasn’t good enough and i had to do better. the voice makes me feel like a kid doing something wrong. And i connect it through my childhood that i always thought i had to do excellent to please anyone. i painted my voice with dark colour so i can know it is not the right way at the light.
My inner critic says don’t disappoint her with a limp dick. She wants you and wants to know you want her and if your dick is limp and you don’t come then she will take it personally and no matter how hard you try to explain she takes it personally.
My inner critic is definitely myself. C’mon you got this. Better get the deed done now before you lose it. There it goes. Don’t let it get away. This often leads to fast and not as enjoyable sex for me and my partner.
For me it’s a feeling that there is something innately wrong with me. That it’s inevitable that I’ll fail. I’m definitely getting to the point where I’d rather not even so I’m deeply attracted to my partner. It brings a great sadness in my heart thinking about it.
My inner critic starts laying down the groundwork the moment I know I have plans that will lead to sex. Everyday it reminds me of the times where I’ve gone soft putting on a condom or taken forever to get hard despite the monumental efforts of my partner. I can then feel myself going numb emotionally, its almost like my inner critic is taking away any “feelings” from the experience so as to avoid disappointment if things don’t go my way.
My inner critic is like a little worm with my own voice in my head. Telling me not to go soft and stressing about if I can keep my erection.
My inner critic has my voice and reminding of what go wrong if I can’t perform.
Mine is whispering and now I tried to listen more carefully and it sounds like my ex wife who actually killed my self confidence in sex
My inner critic feels like just a weak, pathetic version of me who is scared of the what ifs and just over complicates everything. If I know sex is approaching I instantly worry I won’t get hard, and how am I supposed to be excited for it when that’s my first thought.
During or just before the sex it’s a begging “Please get hard, please get hard”
Also share an inner critic combination of people here, before sex its tips and what to do in order to perform sufficiently, then right before sex it kinda focuses on initiation and am i doing this right, and during its just helpful things like focus on the feeling.
It’s always my own voice and my own “character” in the back of my head, looking out my own eyes and judging me poorly. Criticising me for not being able to provide what the person I am with wants and which I’ve promised them I can give.
My inner critic is vague, but it’s my voice, and sort of like a sad(ish), meek, downtrodden version of me…scared of disappointing my wife…scared of being seen as “weak” or not masculine enough. Hell, scared to even be seen at all maybe? Also telling me I’m just getting too old (48) even though this problem is quite new.
Not a voice so much as a nagging reminder that I’m tense, and therefore not in the moment, which causes further tension and separation from the moment. A viscous circle
It’s myself, telling me to concentrate or to find something that turns me on, when I masturbate
My inner critic has my own voice. It’s like a quiet, low, almost worried voice that says things like “you’re probably not going to stay hard”, or “you’re just going to repeat what happened the last time and go soft”, or “she’s going to be so disappointed in you”.
My inner critic is just thoughts with myself. Probably my voice or no voice. Just keeps questioning things happening around. Is she enjoying it? Am I good enough? Am I doing something wrong? Is she bored? Am I hurting her? Am I really enjoying it? If not, why am I not enjoying it? Will I ejaculate too soon? And after a few fresh times of not being hard, am I hard enough? Will I stay hard enough. Oh I’ve got to get a condom. And by the end of all that and just before the act, I’m all out. Sometimes for just a couple of minutes, sometimes longer.
I’ve always recognized my inner critic. It’s the other me. I have a nice, reasonable side who is usually dominant in my head; then there’s the judgmental asshole side who comes out when I’m having bad mental health days. I can separate them really easy, but the mean one gets louder sometimes. It’s literally like there’s 2 very distinct people in my head.
Before sex my own voice is telling me, your not going to get it up…i would then try to avoid sex and would watch porn instead. My long term ex parnter was also very critical of the situation, even making fun out of it on times.