I am 18 years old, healthy, and an athlete. I am good looking but I have always put so much pressure on myself when it comes to losing my virginity. It’s caused me to fail at trying to have sex with my ex and current girlfriend. Whether it’s being afraid to try again or having erection issues in the moment, I always somehow deflect and make myself not care about it, but later I’ll think about it and get motivation to try again. This leads to me being in the same spot and again feeling mentally hopeless in my situation. I feel like I’m not living up to my age sexually and it eats at me.
3 Likes
I understand your frustration, but please do not compare yourself to others and especially what you hear on the internet.
From what I can understand from your post, there seems to be a lot of pressure you are applying to yourself. There’s also a lot of self doubt. I would probably work on that. Practice arguing with your inner voice, let the negative thoughts come in, but then counter them with a positive voice. Something that enforces the good and builds you up. Over time and practice you will feel more confident and be more ready once the time comes.
If you can, be honest with your partner. I know it’s difficult, but communication is the biggest part of any relationship. Hopefully she will understand and even try and help you through your nerves. Hell, she’s probably just as nervous as you.
2 Likes