The unknown is a scary place

For me its not knowing what is going to happen if anything at all. Sometimes I think it mat be easier to know that I wont get an erection and then keep it opposed to having things work as they should one time and the next nothing.

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I agree. The not knowing is the hardest part. Relaxing and looking for other endings than penetrative sex seem to be the answer. But you have to have a partner who understands that.