Situational performance anxiety

For me it’s the pregnancy phobia. I had a past traumatic incident. Because of that every time when I get to put a condom and penetrate I am having hard time to keep it up.

Thinking about the erection,

No

When we try to transition from foreplay to intercourse. I start thinking too much about “staying hard,” which increases my anxiety and I lose my erection.

Meeting a person for a first time, worrying if I’ll be interesting, or confident enough, insecurities, fear that my penis won’t get hard.

so the moment where my erection would start to die out would be when after the making out and the foreplay, I would get nervous and anxious about the intercourse and wonder if I will stay hard, and my inner critic starts to kick in and begin to spectate. At that point I would lose my erection and would be embarrassed about it. I will start be in the moment more and enjoy, maybe even get exited it penetrate

Putting on condoms, going right from foreplay to penetration, and straight into penetration altogether are all triggers for me. Or indications that she’s ready when I’m not really begin “spectatoring.”

Transitioning

I feel like time is a trigger for me. Am I getting hard fast enough? Should I be hard already? Now that I am hard, I should stick it in now because I don’t know if it will last. None of that is healthy

When she gets on top…. I tend to have low confidence of keeping my erection and usually lose it.

When we are spontaneously kissing and nature kicking in and I’m getting an erection…then there is a break to move to the bedroom… my heart starts pounding and that’s the beginning of the spectator. Stuck in my head.

from foreplay to sec happening if i don’t have an erection already i think that sex won’t happen

Thinking about my partner’s sexual history

Once oral begins, because that means I’m on deck to perform.

Yeah - just before penetration! That’s a killer…

Having my hair pulled.
Having my nipples touched.
Hearing other noises (pets, TV, shitty music).
Being cold.

The minute that we talk about maybe having sex I end up overthinking it so much that I get anxious and feel like I wont perform so then avoid even trying. When we do get to the point where we try we will start with foreplay but then when I know it’s leading to sex my anxiety increases and I go soft. It’s a viscous circle and I overthink getting an erection to the point where I think too much about situations where I feel like I should get aroused and don’t

Condoms make me anxious and take me out of the moment.

I usually require oral stimulation to get hard enough to penetrate.

I get anxious if there’s a chance of me topping my husband, where I will start spectatoring about whether my dick is hard well before the point of penetration. Then when the point of penetration comes if I’m actually still hard, I normally lose it when I go to lube up, or I will definitely lose it at the point of trying penetration. If I’m not topping (and I know I’m not going to be) then I very rarely have any problems.

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I don’t even know… dorsnt get up even when im sleeping