Performance anxiety during pregnancy

Hello, my wife and I are pregnant and we are already in the third trimester. At the beginning of the pregnancy, I started having erection problems due to stress and other factors. We also went through a stressful whole house remodel. I have dealt with performance anxiety off and on through my adult life. Normally it would last about a week or two then correct itself overtime. However, this time around I am 8 months into this nonsense.

I have tried everything except for viagra and pharmaceutical intervention. When I masturbate, I have no problems getting erect… and I’m quite hard… but when I’m with my wife I’m about 70% erect and when she brings out her vibrator I go down to 50%… I don’t know what’s going on but all I can say is that this pregnancy has a big factor. I’m not even thinking about the pregnancy or the baby at all during sex. Any ideas?

2 Likes

Let her know you are in your her head during sex right now and that if she could just be patient with you while you are working through it and to not make a big deal about it if you can’t get hard every-time.

When you go to have sex try not to think about how hard or not hard you are even if you’re fully limp try to stay in the moment and focus more on her. What has helped me is even before you go into being intimate just agree before hand that you’re just going to fool around and not have sex that night but do everything else, toys oral, manual and if you happen to get hard enough you can always throw sex on the table mid way through.

It makes it difficult when they are pregnant because they are already not feeling great/sexy so it’s another obstacle to get in the right mood for her to which is probably throwing you off a bit.

2 Likes

The reliance on the sex you is making you feel inadequate … perhaps ask her to use it in her own time rather than with you ?

1 Like