Identifying the inner critic during soft penis pleasuring

Nothing directly about my penis. I know I have a good one. It was more like like, “How is this silliness going to help me, better than the rest of the BS I have tried.” But it was cool, cannot remember the last time I took 10 minutes to look and chill with it.

too small

At first it was like why aren’t you hard yet if you’re playing with it? That’s what it’s for.

My brain questioned myself about why I didn’t get hard by touching it and why I didn’t feel sexual at all when I was having this exercise. I also noticed that I didn’t get hard every time I touched my penis without sexual desire in my head, which was surprising to me. I always thought that I would get turned on as long as I focus on my penis which I now find is not true.

That I wasn’t as virile or as masculine as previous partners have been

it’s too small. It’s a child’s penis. I can hard here but not during sex.
It doesn’t cooperate.

I was worrying that I should be able to get hard if it’s being touched for 10 minutes

I tried to remind myself that this was not an exercise to get that kind of pleasure, I wasn’t thinking sexy thoughts and therefore it would be weird if I did get hard

I kept getting hard. Never thought I’d get frustrated by getting a boner

My inner critic noticed how small I think my soft penis is. Even though I’m aware when I’m erect above average there is a certain amount of shame or embarrassment I feel about how small I think it is soft

It was nice to relax and not have the pressure to get an erection.

Yeah like the idea that it’s being touched so it should be hard and because it’s not I’m a failure and will never be hard during sex

You should be getting hard!

It was wondering why I was getting semi hard and not hard.

Look how small it is. You can’t fuck a girl with that soft thing

Initially it was playing the old tapes of bigger is better. In general the exercise was difficult because I kept on startling to get hard. The few moments I remained flaccid, once past the weirdness, I kind of felt like protecting my little buddy— it looked so defenseless, kind of cute: like a little turtle with wrinkles and all.

I did it also before. It is easier than real life as no pressure.

It was telling me how my penis is a useless flap that hangs off of me. If it can’t get hard what’s the point of it. And it just sits there and is like a limb that doesn’t matter

Just the usual bad memories started to play in my head. My heart rate started to increase and I could feel myself tensing up just like usual. Introduced some of the box breathing into the mix and it helped to calm me down a bit

Inner critic said my dick used to react differently previously but now its quite useless and i have to find a way to enjoy erection and sex as soon as possible

The thought of touching the penis without the objective of getting an erection was good for me. I’ve long lost those days of getting hard by the slightest touch. Just feeling some pleasure of my touch without expectations of ejaculation was helpful.