My inner critic was saying that this should be making me hard, but it wasn’t
It was saying that I should be getting hard.
Basically said it was small and I wasn’t gonna get hard
It’s mild criticism but i did feel i should be getting hard
I was worried that it looked unimpressive soft
Definitely heard the inner critic.
I had a really hard time keeping it soft, I tried to think of things that were very “unsexy” to get it soft again. But none of those things had such an impact as when I’m trying to get erect with my partner and that fear kicks in
I noticed I could get hard very easily basically whenever I wanted to. Then the inner critic started making me feel bad about myself because I can’t perform when I need to but I can by myself
My inner critic wasn’t being especially harsh but I do feel like I have insecurities about the size of my penis and so my mind was focusing on that a little bit.
the inner critc kept questioning why i didn’t feel much and why i wasn’t hard
My inner critic was curious how it would go.
I was thinking at some point what strange thing it is—how it looks, how it feels.
But then I began to understand why this was useful too.
I got hard, but it wasn’t “strong” I guess so it was easy to let it go down. I could get it about halfway and I think that’s where it was most of the time and I felt a bit of anxiety in that it was only there. Like I should have felt more. If I used some lotion instead of dry hands I think it would have been much different
As an uncircumcised guy, I’ve always felt the inner critic tell me that an uncircumcised penis is only “worthy” when it is hard, and even then it’s not as good as a circumcised one (thanks Porn!). It will take more sessions but my goal is to appreciate what it is and not let the inner critic tell me these lies, especially since my wife has NO problems with it.
Continued to tell me why I need to get errect and why I should get effect.
A lot of pressure.
She won’t want you if you can’t get hard
This is weird and it’s weird that I’m doing this.
That I really need to do some manscaping. That I’m a grow-er, not a show-er, and I should really put more effort in to obscuring how tiny it looks when I’m soft.
I realized the expectations passed on to me by family and culture in general are mean and unrealistic.
It is all right to be soft sometimes.
It felt as if it told me I’d never have an erection again, which is a regular worry/thought I have when it comes to ED.