Talked to me about hair and my circumcision.
I was both annoyed and glad that I started getting hard without trying. Glad that my penis works, but annoyed that it was working without me trying.
It questioned why haven’t gotten an erection yet, as if my penis just doesn’t work anymore.
Do you really think this is going to work. Its easy to focus on sensation and feel when you are on your own.
Worried that it is supposed to be getting hard potentially but didn’t. Feeling like it should’ve been hard and wasn’t. Fear that a situation may arise again with the same results.
It’s not gonna work. This is ridiculous, closer
Inner thoughts of trying to erect making me think of things that will get me hard.
When doing the soft penis exercise I heard my inner critic say more curious things than critical. If I am being honest, I didn’t really know weather or not I should take what was being said personally.
I thought my penis didnt feel super sensitive to touch, which yriggered my inner critic
That remedying this is going to be quite difficult
I only noticed now, that my inner critic is my current girlfriend. That was tough
Inner critic was mostly silent but I felt awash with a mood that felt like ‘you are not capable’.
When I noticed it and paid attention to it, it faded away.
I really got the sense that my penis is very tightly bound to performing and that performance is tied to perfectionism.
The mood puts me in a state of needing to surpass some level of ‘good enough’ which is bar set by something out there, not in me. This translates to not being hard enough. And when I don’t get hard the thoughts of performance anxiety come in and the spiral starts.
That no matter how much I try it won’t work ever and that I should be feeling more and getting hard when I touch
i thought it was fun i played with it like it was a gummy worm had no negativity coursing through me at all
That it was silly for me to be sitting there playing with a limp dick.
It told me that I should’ve got hard anyway and that my penis, when soft, is something that no one would ever like or consider attractive
The inner critic was telling that I couldn’t get hard, but at the same time that I should get hard if I’m touching and focusing on my penis. I was trying to fight back the inner critic in my mind, it was a bit hard but at least I tried.
It should be easy to stimulate your penis into full erection, even with casual touching. You must be broken or not a man
My inner critic was telling me that i should be getting an erection because im touching my peniseven though the idea of the exercise is to be soft.
About 2 or 3 minutes into the exercise I started to get hard. My inner voice was like, “ am I doing this wrong?” But then continued on saying, “I guess if you play with your Dick, it’s Bound to get hard, right?” Then I was in the strange position of wanting it to be soft instead of hard. My inner voice and I shared a good laugh about how ironic that was. Anyway, I stopped touching it and just looked at it for the rest of the time. I consciously told myself, “hard or soft, it’s a normal part of me, and either way, it’s natural.”