Hi all,
29 year old here and I’m struggling with ED when it comes to sex with new people. I’ve found that I’ve taken to using viagra or cialis when I first sleep with someone new for the first couple of times to help me get over the nerves.
However in my most recent encounter this didn’t help me at all.
Was just curious if anyone else had been through this or something similar and had advice to share.
Thanks in advance.
I am on your same boat. New encounters for me are very hard… well actually not hard enough. I used to take boner pills for the first few encounters with new people and then when I was comfortable and relaxed I would give them up. Now tho I made the decision of just stop using them. I want to work on this fear and challenge myself to understand the roots of it. I’ll have plenty of time with boner pills when I am older, I just want to be comfortable in my skins with others now
This has happened to me from time to time even since I was very young. To me, most of the time, it seems like the timing is off. Well, you’re not really in the mood. It is important to feel in the mood and be relaxed. Otherwise, you’ll likely be up in your head instead of in the moment
Same. But I’ve taken a different route. This might be kink specific, but I think it will apply to all types of sex. I think there’s something to be said for “taking it slow”. It sounds old fashioned and annoying to our quick-fix programmed minds (I’m v guilty of wanting instant gratification with everything I do). I’ve found slowly building sexual acts with a new partner, session by session, spreads out those initial nerves and makes them less potent.
TLDR: I don’t go into intercourse on the first session. I do… Other things, and make that the focus. I take my time and really enjoy it. Then when intercourse is on the table in the second, third, fourth session, I know this new person’s body better and I’m less anxious and nervous.